Ask Amy: Death of Child
Q: In a workshop, I heard you say that the loss of a child could be the best thing that ever happened. Initially I was shocked. I don’t see how a parent could ever think this, but being a Course student for five years, I keep an open mind. Can you explain?
A: Your question cuts to the quick, and therefore offers huge potential for healing. First, notice how ego changes what was said just a little bit, so little it seems inconsequential. The actual phrase used was, “Every moment, no exceptions, is the best moment of your life.” Ego distorts, misinterprets and misses the point – that’s its job. It does this to maintain its false identity.
Your open mind provides the space for the miracle. “It is to this unsealed and open mind that truth returns, unhindered and unbound.” (T-31.V.17:3) The “best moment” is a timeless moment. The timeless moment is what the Course calls a holy instant.
“The holy instant is this instant and every instant. … Delay it not. For beyond the past and future, where you will not find it, it stands in shimmering readiness for your acceptance.” (T-15.IV.1:3-8)
The holy instant reveals you are not the body but the One Eternal Formless Self. There is no pain or loss here. There is no memory here. There is no personal identity here. There is no “untimely death” here. Jesus tells us 20 times in the Course, “Brother, there is no death.” and who is better qualified to assure us of this than he?
To the ego, this is outrageous and heartless. When in the throes of grief, this may seem impossible to grasp. But this is the perfect time to rely on the Holy Spirit. Give Him your tears, your shattered dreams, your rage, your guilt, your agony. This clears a space to receive the miracles that surely follow. You may or may not recognize them, depending on the openness of your mind. Either way, healing occurs.
The ego believes in loss; the Holy Spirit reminds you that you are Whole. The ego declares you are form; the Holy Spirit reminds you that you are Spirit. The ego wants you to witness to form: obviously you are a body. Jesus witnesses to Content: obviously you and your child are deathless Life. “The holy instant is the Holy Spirit’s most useful learning device for teaching you love’s meaning. For its purpose is to suspend judgment entirely.” (T-15.V.1:1-2)
A Course in Miracles is about shifting from the human point of view, which we take for granted as the only point of view, to recognizing what you really are. You are not a person; you are Spirit. God is not other than you; God is your Self. This is revealed in the holy instant, which offers us glimpses of Timelessness. Glimpses eventually stabilize as Vision. The Holy Spirit uses time for holy instants until they culminate in the Atonement – the final undoing; the recognition that the separation never occurred.
“There may come a time when you thank God for your difficulties,” says the contemporary mystic, Mooji, “because that pain led you to God.” The death of a child can be viewed as a devastating tragedy or an opportunity to awaken.
Please feel free to continue this inquiry with me; more questions may arise as your contemplation deepens.
Recommended Reading: Self-Concept versus Self (T-31.V); The Holy Instant and Special Relationships (T-15.V); The Bridge to the Real World (T-16.VI); This Is the Best Moment of Your Life by Amy Torres
This Q&A appears in the Ask Amy column from the Sept-Oct 2015 issue of Miracles magazine. Miracles is a well-loved staple in the ACIM community. For a subscription, email [email protected] or call 845-496-9089. To ask Amy a question, email miracles (at) amytorresacim (dot) com
Yep, really! The 2016 CMC ACIM Conference is being held in Vegas: a spiritual gathering in the gambling capital of the world. “Gambling is a way of buying hope on credit,” says Alan Wykes, author of The Complete Illustrated Guide to Gambling. This is because the ego dangles hope like a carrot to keep humans invested in their false identity.
* Experience using your desires for the highest good of all
As soon as you sign up, you have begun to reap the benefits of the conference! This is because you have put your willingness into action. You have planted the seed of awakening. Your miracles begin here and multiply endlessly through you (even if it seems as though nothing is happening).
The Las Vegas Conference will be held at the Rio All-Suite Hotel and Casino just off the Las Vegas strip from 
Are you able to feel love for yourself? Many, many people are self-critical and believe that self-love is conceited and selfish. If this describes you, please know that chronic self-criticism is not helping you become a better person, achieve humility, or be selfless.
You may recognize the self-blamer and the blamer within yourself. This is because the ego is a contradictory, paradoxical thought system which has made you the victim of yourself. The way this works is that the ego keeps us endlessly distracted by two choices: victim or attacker. Usually, you will identify with one more than the other — notice if you usually feel attacked or the victim of attack. The ego has had great success with mesmerizing us with these two choices, however, eventually, it becomes clear that there is a third choice, a better way.
away as you see through the ego dream state to the One Self you truly are. This can occur over many years of mind-shifting as your spiritual path builds conviction within you. There can be significant spiritual experiences along the way which are best used to confirm that you are on The Path, following your Inner Teacher Home.
This timeless, formless LoveLight is your God-Self. The mighty magnetism of your God-Self is constantly attracting you to Love. As powerful as belief in the ego is, it cannot come close to trumping the Love which is your true inner Self.
One may ask, ‘What is the best way for a person to understand his life’s purpose?’ If one follows the bent of one’s own mind, if one follows the track to which one is attracted, if one follows one’s own inclination, which is not satisfied with anything else, one feels, ‘There is something waiting for me (which one does not know at the time), which will bring me satisfaction.’ Besides, if one is intuitive and mystical, it is easier still, because then one is continually told what is the purpose of one’s life.
This is the way open to all who are ready.
Q: According to A Course in Miracles, “the script is written.”* If the script is already written by ourselves, why don’t we all write the perfect script for the illusion – health, money, beauty, etc.?
A: When taken out of context, “the script is written” appeals to human curiosity about fate, destiny, and the possibility of rewriting our lives. It seems to refer to us as people. Many books and movies have been based on traveling to the past or future and the consequences of changing actions and events. But this is the ego script.
in Aramaic. Most scholars agree that the common language of the entire region was Aramaic and that Jesus probably spoke Aramaic and was most likely named in Aramaic.
in Hebrew and is commonly transliterated into English as Yeshua, which is a Hebrew contraction for the name Yehoshua meaning Yah is salvation or Yah saves. Many Biblical references, such as Young’s Analytical Concordance, have concluded that his name was Yeshua.
which may be pronounced something like “ee-ay-soos”. Still, that’s pretty close to the original name, except for the letter “s” that was added at the end.