Review I: Introduction

Commentary (full lesson beneath commentary)

This is our first review.  It weaves together the first fifty lessons, reinforcing them in my mind.  I am learning to bring the principles into any situation, especially if I am upset, to live from the Calm and Quiet of my Eternal Truth.  Opportunities present themselves all day long 🙂

These first fifty concepts are reviewed in slightly different language enabling us to sponge in the ideas themselves rather than ritualizing or memorizing, which serves no purpose.  Saturation in God’s Mind is the healing which leads me Home.  Happy sigh.

REVIEW I

Introduction

Beginning with today we will have a series of review periods.  Each of them will cover five of the ideas already presented, starting with the first and ending with the fiftieth.  There will be a few short comments after each of the ideas, which you should consider in your review.  In the practice periods, the exercises should be done as follows:

Begin the day by reading the five ideas, with the comments included.  Thereafter, it is not necessary to follow any particular order.  In considering them, though each one should be practiced at least once.  Devote two minutes or more to each practice period, thinking about the idea and the related comments after reading them over.  Do this as often as possible during the day.  If any of the five ideas appeals to you more than the others, concentrate on that one.  At the end of the day, however, be sure to review all of them once more.

It is not necessary to cover the comments that follow each idea either literally or thoroughly in the practice periods.  Try, rather, to emphasis the central point and think about it as part of your review of the idea to which it relates.  After you have read the idea and the related comments, the exercises should be done with your eyes closed and when you are alone and in a quiet place, if possible.

This is emphasized for practice periods at your stage of learning.  It will be necessary, however, that you learn to require no special settings in which to apply what you have learned.  You will need your learning most in the situations that appear to be upsetting, rather than in those that already seem to be calm and quiet.  The purpose of your learning is to enable you to bring the quiet with you, and to heal distress and turmoil.  This is not done by avoiding them and seeking a haven of isolation for yourself.  You will yet learn that peace is part of you, and requires only that you be there to embrace any situation in which you are.  And finally you will learn that there is no limit to where you are, so that your peace is everywhere, as you are.

You will note that, for review purposes, some of the ideas are not given in quite their original form.  Use them as they are given here.  It is not necessary to return to the original statements, nor to apply the ideas as was suggested then.  We are now emphasizing the relationships among the first fifty of the ideas we have covered, and the cohesiveness of the thought system to which they are leading you.

To see the entire Workbook for Students, get a copy of the book, A Course in Miracles, or visit the original publisher, Foundation for Inner Peace, online at http://acim.org/Lessons/index.html.  To have the lesson delivered daily to your email box for free, sign up with http://www.acimdailylesson.com/category/daily-lessons-from-a-course-in-miracles.

What I Realize as I Blog the ACIM Workbook

I started off blogging the Workbook this year without really knowing what would happen.  Initially a tagline popped out of me effortlessly, “My experience with the ACIM Workbook” and that is what I wrote about.  My habit is to do the morning lesson, then go straight to my computer, letting the feeling of my experience of the exercise or meditation flow through my words.

Now I notice that sometimes I’m explaining the lesson, or even trying to explain or translate what Jesus says into my own words so that I understand, clarify and reinforce the teachings for myself.  Maybe this is overkill.  Maybe I should stick with my pure experience …  It’s occurring to me that this year the blog is meant to be my experience without explanation–let the lessons speak for themselves.

And NEXT YEAR I’m going to translate the lessons !  I wonder if that will actually happen.  What’s funnier is that according to ACIM metaphysics everything has already happened … I wonder if I’m having a memory of what has already happened: first I reported my experience and communicated the experience Itself as best I could.  Then I translated … it’s like the Harville Hendrix Imago work: repeat back what was said and understand more fully as you do.

My concern is that a pure report of my experience may be confusing to my readers.  That’s funny.  Who are my readers?  I am you, you are me … anyway, if you do need clarification, please feel free to shoot me a question or comment and I will be happy to respond.

Inexplicably Predictably Happy

white lilyRecently a phrase popped into my head, “Inexplicably predictably happy.” That’s one way I experience God — words come to me and I can tell they are not mine (some people call this “channeling”).

I was actually grieving at the time I “heard” those words, but even though I was grieving, I remembered to ask God to remind me of who I really was. In that moment, as I cried, I felt my heart expand and a peace move through me that was filled with joy. There was no logical explanation about why I needn’t grieve — I just felt at peace, even as I wept.

There was a smile inside me that said, “Inexplicably predictably happy” and I knew it to be True. “Inexplicably” because the joy of God is beyond words and explanations. “Predictably” because God is reliable, and if I ask Him for help, I will receive His help. “Happy” because God is full — full of joy, peace, love, eternal life, infinite creativity, and there is no way I cannot be happy because God’s treasures are my inheritance. Joy, peace, love, eternal life, infinite creativity are always mine — I just forget.

These days I remember my inheritance more and more and life is so interesting, full of wonderful surprises and beautiful people. I know that when I’m scared and overwhelmed that I’ve just forgotten Who I really am, and knowing that is a great comfort. Another name for the Holy Spirit is The Comforter, and He really is. When I accept Him, I am inexplicably predictably happy 🙂  And then comes the realization, just like A Course in Miracles says: there is no “me”!

Copyright © 2011 Amy Torres.  All rights reserved worldwide.

Step 10: Continued to take personal inventory

The original 12 steps were scribed by Bill W. when he was illuminated with the idea to establish Alcoholics Anonymous.  No doctor was able to help him in his desperate attempts to end his addiction to liquor.  Only the Holy Spirit instructing him to help his brother was successful.  I say the 12 steps were scribed because it’s my sense that they flowed through Bill as opposed to his deliberate writing of them.  I’m opening the Big Book right now to double-check my facts and I’ll be back to revise them if I’m mistaken.  (In the past, I would have said “if I’m wrong,” but now I spontaneously use the word “mistaken”–much gentler, and, of course, open to correction.)

Step 10:  Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

Step 10 grows out of Step 4–Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. After we have written down a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves, taking our time to be ruthlessly self-examining, we naturally cultivate a taste for using this process on daily basis.  Part of this process is sharing what we’ve written with God and with a trusted witness.  That person is usually a sponsor in the 12-step program, but in my case it was my psychotherapist who participated in 12-step programs himself, so he had a good understanding of what this was about.

It is crucial that the listener we choose is non-judgmental.  That way, through his ability to see the light in us, we begin to experience ourselves as worthy of forgiveness–this often takes time.  When we do finally get it that we are deserving of forgiveness, we are much more able to extend forgiveness to others.  Sometimes this works conversely: as we notice how generously we extend forgiveness to others, we begin to experience ourselves as deserving of the same kindness, understanding and generosity from others.

It is very similar to miracle principle #3 in A Course in Miracles:  “Miracles occur naturally as expressions of love.  The real miracle is the love that inspires them.  In this sense everything that comes from love is a miracle.”  Doing a 10th step on a daily basis is a way of loving ourselves and others.

There is something I’ve come to believe about the 12 steps which I want to share.  They were written by an alcoholic who got into all kinds of trouble and hurt lots of people along the way.  That is a certain kind of person, and that type of person has amends to make to lots of other people.  But in the case of the codependent, the one who depends on the alcoholic, and often enables the alcoholic, the type of person is more likely to hurt herself.  In this case, the amends and the character defects are most needed toward oneself, rather than others.

This is important because it occurs to me that a customized 10th step for me might read, “Continued to take personal inventory and when we were right promptly admitted it.”  I was right that the alcoholic’s drinking was harmful to both of us.  I was right that the atmosphere of an alcoholic household was toxic.  I was right that my feelings of depletion and despair evaporated when I was in a healthier environment, such as a yoga class, a support group, a spiritual retreat, or with people who were sober and in recovery or psychotherapy in some shape or form.

In other words, for the codependent the essential task is to build a sense of self, to trust ourselves more, to listen to our intuition, and to develop more inner strength.  As we believe in ourselves, we can take better care of ourselves and become emotionally self-sufficient and financially independent.  These are the healing tasks for earnest people like me who unconsciously turned to alcoholics for a more daring, playful approach to life.

Of course I sometimes need to make amends to other people.  Al-anonics, or codependents, tend to feel victimized and so we blame others for being mean or self-centered or emotionally unavailable.  The truth is we need to be a little more self-centered in order to meet our own needs before catering to other people.  We only do that because we hope that once they are well, they will partner with us, or take care of us. This is all well and good if they would–but if they are not inclined to heal, we have to cut our losses and heal ourselves with God’s help.

We are not victims and no one is to blame for anything.  We are all immature in our own particular way, and we are learning to grow up.  Jerry Seinfeld said he liked being grown up because it meant he could eat cookies before dinner if he wanted to!  Many of us feel that being grown up robs us of carefree fun and imprisons us in a life of endless responsibilities and obligations.  But A Course in Miracles says, “Beware of the temptation to perceive yourself unfairly treated.”  It explains that, “You have no enemy except yourself, and you are enemy indeed to him [any person in our life we are upset with] because you do not know him as yourself.”

The teaching is that as we see the Light of Forgiveness in ourselves, we realize that underneath the personality of ourselves and others is a spiritual Light which is our Truth.  As long as we insist that there is someone to blame, we block God’s Light.  This is not to condone bad behavior–it is to empower us to realize that bad behavior is a call for Love.  Sometimes Love means we take care of ourselves first and pray for another without having to take a concrete action on their behalf.

I’ll be writing more on the 12 steps and how I’ve customized them to myself.  I hope this makes their message even clearer and more useful for people like me–people who tend to take ourselves for granted and haven’t realized we’ve blamed ourselves or hurt ourselves in ways that deserve forgiveness toward ourselves.

Sunday Afternoon ACIM w Amy Class

A Course in Miracles with Amy Torres

When:  Sundays, 2 – 4 pm
Where:  Amy’s Place, Naples, Florida
Suggested Donation:  $20 per class (no one turned away due to lack of funds)

A Course in Miracles is a brilliant form of spiritual psychotherapy which teaches us to work miracles on a daily basis, and how to forgive effortlessly.  The format of this weekly ongoing class includes:

  • We read aloud from A Course in Miracles
  • Questions, commentary and discussion flow naturally from the material
  • Join class at any time–you do not have to “start from the beginning” … and you can drop in when you like–consistent attendance is optional 🙂
  • Learn how to cultivate a relationship with your Inner Teacher
  • Understand why it is essential to develop a “healthy ego” in order to give up the ego thought system
  • Establish the habit of looking at the ego with your Inner Teacher, and how to discern the ego’s voice and the voice of Spirit
  • Work with the Course on both Level 1: the metaphysical teachings, and Level 2: daily practices for using this world as a spiritual classroom
  • Gain more clarity on miracles, forgiveness, the holy instant, our true purpose, projection/perception, special relationships, the obstacles to peace, the origin of the world, the development of trust, who are God’s teachers, and more
  • Enriching for both beginners and longtime Course students
  • Warm, non-judgmental atmosphere where all questions are welcome

Come join us for a light-hearted approach to an ego-annihilating (in a good way!) spiritual teaching.  ACIM reverses our fearful ego-based thinking and offers us the “happy dream” through which we experience ourselves as innocent rather than guilty, and life as peaceful rather than threatening.  We learn a new definition of forgiveness, and how to remove the obstacles to the awareness of Love’s presence in the undoing process the Course offers us.

Reverend Amy Torres is an established ACIM teacher, as well as an interfaith minister, spiritual counselor, Gestalt psychotherapist, and yoga instructor.  You can watch Amy’s video interviews and read what students have to say about her classes at www.amytorresacim.com.  She is also available for private and individual sessions.  For more information, call 212-340-1201 or email miracles@amytorresacim.com. You can also join via http://meetup.com/ACIMwAmy

Lesson 6: I am upset because I see something that is not there.

Commentary (full lesson beneath commentary)

This lesson equalizes all upsets.  It calmly, with authority, states that I am seeing something that is not there, namely, the illusory world, the world of form.  I am seeing something that is not there, and then I am attributing my upset feelings to a world that is not there.   I am projecting my upset feelings outward, in order to avoid awareness of what caused my upset feelings.  As I practice the exercises in Lesson 6, there is an undoing process that takes me back to the original upset–the tiny, mad idea that I could separate from my Father’s Mind.

LESSON 6

I am upset because I see something that is not there.

The exercises with this idea are very similar to the preceding ones.  Again, it is necessary to name both the form of upset (anger, fear, worry, depression and so on) and the perceived source very specifically for any application of the idea.  For example:

I am angry at _________ because I see something that is not there.
I am worried about __________ because I see something that is not there.

Today’s idea is useful for application to anything that seems to upset you, and can profitably be used throughout the day for that purpose.  However, the three or four practice periods which are required should be preceded by a minute or so of mind searching, as before, and the application of the idea to each upsetting thought uncovered in the search.

Again, if you resist applying the idea to some upsetting thoughts more than to others, remind yourself of the two cautions stated in the previous lesson:

There are no small upsets. They are all equally disturbing to my peace of mind.

And:

I cannot keep this form of upset and let the others go.  For the purposes of these exercises, then, I will regard them all as the same.

Let’s practice together!  Watch and listen to me reading each ACIM Lesson on Youtube.  Also, check out Workin’ the Workbook, my online class which supports the ACIM Workbook practice.

Lesson 5: I am never upset for the reason I think.

Commentary (full lesson beneath commentary)

It seems to us as if we’re upset for a never-ending number of reasons.  But the metaphysical explanation that A Course in Miracles offers us is that we believe we’ve separated from God, and the terror and the horror we feel at the thought that we are exiled from Heaven permanently, is the only reason we are ever upset.  Everything that we think we are upset about is just an ego distraction.  The ego believes it will be annihilated if we wake up.  And it will disappear back into the nothingness from which it came.  In the meantime, we can practice “I am never upset for the reason I think.”

The lesson goes on to say we can apply it to specific personal situations, as well as to whatever comes to mind.  I can fill in, “I am not angry at Mayor Bloomberg for raising the subway fare and bridge and tunnel tolls for the reason I think.  I am not afraid of my bills going up for the reason I think.  I am not worried about money for the reason I think.”  And what’s more, all upsets are equal.  A splinter, a tumor, a scratch on the new furniture, a death in the family–it is all the same.  The ego gloats at the obscenity of equalizing what, to it, clearly have different levels of importance.  We will never choose God if He is so insensitive to our feelings.  But the truth is that God knows us as we Are.  Our “work” is to undo the layers of forgetfulness which “cover” our True Nature.

“I am never upset for the reason I think” is one of the best reminders I have.  I apply it as often as I manage to remember and it always helps.

LESSON 5

I am never upset for the reason I think.

This idea, like the preceding one, can be used with any person, situation or event you think is causing you pain.  Apply it specifically to whatever you believe is the cause of your upset, using the description of the feeling in whatever term seems accurate to you.  The upset may seem to be fear, worry, depression, anxiety, anger, hatred, jealousy or any number of forms, all of which will be perceived as different.  This is not true.  However, until you learn that form does not matter, each form becomes a proper subject  for the exercises for the day.  Applying the same idea to each of them separately is the first step in ultimately recognizing they are all the same.

When using the idea for today for a specific perceived cause of an upset in any form, use both the name of the form in which you see the upset, and the cause which you ascribe to it.  For example:

I am not angry at _____________ for the reason I think.
I am not afraid of __________________ for the reason I think.

But again, this should not be substituted for practice periods in which you first search your mind for “sources” of upset in which you believe, and forms of upset which you think result.

In these exercises, more than in the preceding ones, you may find it hard to be indiscriminate, and to avoid giving greater weight to some subjects than to others.  It might help to precede the exercises with this statement:

There are no small upsets. They are all equally disturbing to my peace of mind.

Then examine your mind for whatever is distressing you, regardless of how much or how little you think it is doing so.

You may also find yourself less willing to apply today’s idea to some perceived sources of upset than to others.  If this occurs, think first of this:

I cannot keep this form of upset and let the others go. For the purposes of these exercises, then, I will regard them as all the same.

Then search your mind for no more than a minute or so, and try to identify a number of different forms of upset that are disturbing you, regardless of the relative importance you may give them. Apply the idea for today to each of them, using the name of both the source of the upset as you perceive it, and of the feeling as you experience it. Further examples are:

I am not worried about _________________ for the reason I think.
I am not depressed about ________________ for the reason I think.

Three or four times during the day is enough.

Let’s practice together!  Watch and listen to me reading each ACIM Lesson on Youtube.  Also, check out Workin’ the Workbook, my online class which supports the ACIM Workbook practice.

Lesson 4: These thoughts do not mean anything. They are like the things I see in this room [on this street, from this window, in this place.]

Commentary (full lesson beneath commentary)

This lesson asks us to look at our thoughts–watch them parade by, and then, apply today’s idea, “These thoughts do not mean anything” to some of the specific thoughts I am having.  It explains that what I consider “good” and “bad” thoughts are really neither, since they are often contradictory, which is why they don’t mean anything.  Ramana Maharshi just said the same thing in Regina Dawn Aker’s new book, The Teachings of Inner Ramana, “If all of the concerns for one day are written down, it may be seen that concerns and imagined solutions conflict with one another, so that no true peace can be found with the mind.”

Lesson 4 goes on to say that good thoughts are “but shadows of what lies beyond, and shadows make sight difficult.  The ‘bad’ ones are blocks to sight, and make seeing impossible.  You do not want either.”  After reading this, Bowl of Saki arrived in my email box and Hazrat Inayat Khan had this to say, “When you stand with your back to the sun, your shadow is before you; but when you turn and face the sun, then your shadow falls behind you.”Synchronicity.  Reinforcements of The Message :) I’ve often thought that good thoughts are the way the ego keeps us tempted to stick with it and bad thoughts are the way the ego keeps us narrowly consumed with a problem, therefore endlessly distracted from our True Nature.

Towards the end Jesus says, “Do not, however, examine your mind for more than a minute or so.  You are too inexperienced as yet to avoid a tendency to become pointlessly preoccupied.”  This makes me bust out laughing.  I have a tendency to become pointlessly preoccupied with nonsense all day long … I guess I feel understood, lol.

LESSON 4

These thoughts do not mean anything.  They are like the things I see in this room [on this street, from this window, in this place].

Unlike the preceding ones, these exercises do not begin with the idea for the day.  In these practice periods, begin with noting the thoughts that are crossing your mind for about a minute.  Then apply the idea to them.  If you are already aware of unhappy thoughts, use them as subjects for the idea.  Do not, however, select only the thoughts you think are “bad.”  You will find, if you train yourself to look at your thoughts, that they represent such a mixture that, in a sense, none of them can be called “good” or “bad.”  This is why they do not mean anything.

In selecting the subjects for the application of today’s idea, the usual specificity is required.  Do not be afraid to use “good” thoughts as well as “bad.”  None of them represents your real thoughts, which are being covered up by them.  The “good” ones are but shadows of what lies beyond, and shadows make sight difficult.  The “bad” ones are blocks to sight, and make seeing impossible.  You do not want either.

This is a major exercise, and will be repeated from time to time in somewhat different form.  The aim here is to train you in the first steps toward the goal of separating the meaningless from the meaningful.  It is a first attempt in the long-range purpose of learning to see the meaningless as outside you, and the meaningful within.  It is also the beginning of training your mind to recognize what is the same and what is different.

In using your thoughts for application of the idea for today, identify each thought by the central figure or event it contains, for example:

This thought about ______________ does not mean anything.  It is like the things I see in this room [on this street, and so on].

You can also use the idea for a particular thought that you recognize as harmful.  This practice is useful, but is not a substitute for the more random procedures to be followed for the exercises.  Do not, however, examine your mind for more than a minute or so.  You are too inexperienced as yet to avoid a tendency to become pointlessly preoccupied.

Further, since these exercises are the first of their kind, you may find the suspension of judgment in connection with thoughts particularly difficult.  Do not repeat these exercises more than three or four times during the day.  We will return to them later.

Let’s practice together!  Watch and listen to me reading each ACIM Lesson on Youtube.  Also, check out Workin’ the Workbook, my online class which supports the ACIM Workbook practice.

Lesson 3: I do not understand anything I see in this room [on this street, from this window, in this place].

Commentary (full lesson beneath commentary)

The instructions state, “The point of the exercises is to help you clear your mind of all past associations, to see things exactly as they appear to you now, and to realize how little you really understand about them.”  We are asked to keep an open mind and suspend judgment.  In the world, if I keep an open mind and suspend all judgment, couldn’t I get into trouble?  But when Jesus firmly suggests that I follow his instructions and have my own experience, how can I refuse?  I gaze around the room and find that my mind softens … I, who love precision, have no desire to even assign words to what I’m seeing … there is a blur of familiar objects devoid of names or relevance.  My heart eases in my chest as some internal pressure I live with daily abates.  Something widens expansively, moving through the heart, the lungs, the arms, and radiates beyond the body.  Here is the love, peace and joy the Course promises.

LESSON 3

I do not understand anything I see in this room [on this street, from this window, in this place].

Apply this idea in the same way as the previous ones, without making distinctions of any kind.  Whatever you see becomes a proper subject for applying the idea.  Be sure that you do not question the suitability of anything for the application of the idea.  These are not exercises in judgment.  Anything is suitable if you see it.  Some of the things you see may have emotionally charged meaning for you.  Try to lay such feelings aside, and merely use these things exactly as you would anything else.

The point of these exercises is to help you clear your mind of all past associations, to see things exactly as they appear to  you now, and to realize how little you really understand about them.  It is therefore essential that you keep a perfectly open mind, unhampered by judgment, in selecting the things to which the idea for the day is to be applied.  For this purpose one thing is like another; equally suitable and therefore equally useful.

Let’s practice together!  Watch and listen to me reading each ACIM Lesson on Youtube.  Also, check out Workin’ the Workbook, my online class which supports the ACIM Workbook practice.

Lesson 2: I have given everything I see in this room [on this street, from this window, in this place] all the meaning that it has for me.

Commentary (full lesson beneath commentary)

In Lesson 2 we are held accountable for assigning meaning to what we see.  Years ago, I was distressed and aggravated when Louise Hay told me I was responsible for choosing my parents in You Can Heal Your Life. Now Jesus is telling me I’m responsible for the meaning of everything!   The ego experiences this as an accusation and a burden of responsibility.  But then there is a glimmer within of … being pulled back in time, sliding backward along some continuum, so there is a telescopic view of how “little me” thinks.  From this long view comprehension comes that the collective ego “I” has assigned meaning to everything “seen”–everything I hurl out of me so that I don’t have to feel the terror of being separate and alone.  Lesson 2 suddenly makes sense, and there is a sense of promise that forgiveness, salvation and Atonement are what’s truly True. :)

LESSON 2

I have given everything I see in this room [on this street, from this window, in this place] all the meaning that it has for me.

The exercises with this idea are the same as those for the first one.  Begin with the things that are near you, and apply the idea to whatever your glance rests on.  Then increase the range outward.  Turn your head so that you include whatever is on either side.  If possible, turn around and apply the idea to what was behind you.  Remain as indiscriminate as possible in selecting subjects for its application, do not concentrate on anything in particular, and do not attempt to include everything you see in a given area, or you will introduce strain.

Merely glance easily and fairly quickly around you, trying to avoid selection by size, brightness, color, material, or relative importance to you.  Take the subjects simply as you see them.  Try to apply the exercise with equal ease to a body or a button, a or a floor, an arm or an apple.  The sole criterion for applying the idea to anything is merely that your eyes have lighted on it.  Make no attempt to include anything particular, but be sure that nothing is specifically excluded.

Let’s practice together!  Watch and listen to me reading each ACIM Lesson on Youtube.  Also, check out Workin’ the Workbook, my online class which supports the ACIM Workbook practice.