God’s Vision or the Ego’s Eyesight?

More than one spiritual path explains that this world is an illusion. Even science now agrees. But what do they mean? And if this world is an illusion, what good does it do us to know that?

This is especially of interest to Course in Miracles students.  We are told right from the start, in the ACIM Preface, that “projection makes perception.”  Another way the Course puts it is that our thoughts are “an outward picture of an inward condition.”

Workbook Lesson 15 explains, “My thoughts are images that I have made.”  It teaches us, “It is because the thoughts you think you think appear as images that you do not recognize them as nothing. You think you think them, and so you think you see them. This is how your ‘seeing’ was made. This is the function you have given your body’s eyes. It is not seeing. It is image making. It takes the place of seeing, replacing vision with illusions.”

ACIM posits that we are hallucinating this world by projecting our imaginary ego thoughts outward.  We are literally a figment of our own imagination.

Let’s break this down: “… the thoughts you think you think”–this tells you that what you consider thinking is not really thinking. What the ego (our sense of individual identity) does is replace God’s One Ever-Extending Loving Thought with images–imaginary thoughts that appear as pictures. You view these pictures and call them “eyesight.” You believe in them, but that does not make them real. The function the ego gives the body’s eyes is to hallucinate images which are not real to distract us from the Reality of God’s Vision which is Unified and Formless.

But why would the ego want to distract us from God’s Vision? Because the ego knows that if we re-discover this Abstract Creative Light within ourselves, the personal self as we know it will unravel and “die.” Within this “death” lies Eternal Life–but that’s not the way the ego sees it (pun intended). One scientist put it this way, “If you look at the universe through a golf ball-sized lens, you will see a universe the size of a golf ball.” The ego limits our experience, but denies that it does this.

Un-think your way through this. Tell yourself, “I do not really think. What I think are my thoughts are actually images the ego made. These images are neither good nor bad, they simply are not real. Would I rather think these puny little thoughts that lead to suffering and death, or would I rather gently peel these images from my eyes today, and truly see what God would have me see?” Ask God, “What would You have me see?” He will show you.

Then you can decide for yourself whether you prefer the image-making eyesight of the ego, or God’s Vision.

How the Homeless Made Me Feel at Home

A student of mine mentioned her encounters with homeless people and it brought to mind a spiritual experience I’d like to share with you.

She was sharing how defensive and guilty she feels during her walk downtown where there are lots of homeless people.   I also felt guilty when I was living in New York City and there were many homeless on the streets.  Some were mentally ill, some were HIV positive, some were out of work, some chose a life on the street.

Some had kittens, some had dogs, some owned a grocery cart overflowing with neatly bound bundles of stuff.  Some hallucinated and shadow boxed.  Some drank and sat in their own excrement.  Many slept under cardboard boxes which made them invisible in broad daylight.  Some smiled, some lashed out, some were dead silent and hid behind their sign.  They all had the obligatory “begging cup.”

I got to know certain “regulars”–folks who would usually be planted in a particular spot.  For the most part, all they required was, “Good morning!,” a splash of change in their coffee cup, and a smile.  If they disappeared from their appointed spot, I would feel uneasy, concerned about them.

But more often, I felt guilty, and sometimes afraid, when I was around them–even if I gave money.  I didn’t want to feel that way–and I was determined to let the fear and guilt evaporate.  I just didn’t know how.  My heart was open … it seemed that I needed less guilt and more courage in my gut.  I began to feel increasingly irritated when I heard people say, “If I gave to all the homeless in NYC, I’d go broke!”  Something about that didn’t ring true.  In fact, it seemed a feeble excuse to look the other way.

One day, I decided to put that statement to the test.  I started putting a dollar into every coffee cup I encountered. It turned out that it was quite affordable to give to all, everyday.

I felt less guilty, now that I was being true to myself.  Often my encounters with the homeless were loving and uplifting.  At first, the gratitude they showed embarrassed me, but then I realized it would do me good to accept their appreciation.  As I relaxed and accepted their “thank yous” and “God bless yous” Love started to flow freely between us.  In fact, homeless people blessed me on a regular basis.

Their smiles and blessings nurtured me and gave me a feeling of community.  It was a time in my life when I was painfully lonely–I was homeless in my heart.  The connection with people who literally didn’t have a roof over their heads, and more importantly, didn’t have a community that embraced them, pulled my heartstrings.  I was having holy encounters with them, and being shown a perfect demonstration of the spiritual law, “Giving is Receiving.”  All for a dollar!

After a while, something in me shifted. The next time I was faced with the second coffee cup of the day, out of my mouth popped, “I gave today.”  I was met with a big smile and, “Bless you.”  No hard feelings.  This homeless person seemed to understand that I, too, had needs.  A Message was communicated:  do what you can, and everyOne will be okay if you continue to let go and let God.   I went back to giving once a day for a while–this time, guilt-free.

Eventually, something in me shifted again. The next time the cup was proffered, I cheerfully, yet kindly said, “No, thank you.” WHAT A MOMENT THAT WAS!  No one was more surprised than me, when those words popped out of my mouth.  “No, thank you”????  What did this even mean?  I had to think about it: the homeless person asked me for money, and I said, “No, thank you,”  … meaning they were offering me a service, and I was refusing it because I didn’t need it at this time.  I had reached a new level of faith, equality, and guiltlessness. 

What freedom to feel so INNOCENT.  How liberating to now know that the homeless person had a higher power and an Inner Teacher, just as I did, just as everyOne did.  I didn’t have to play God anymore.  I didn’t have to save the world, one person at a time.  I just needed to Love and Be Loved.

My first encounters with the homeless had been fearful and guilty.  As I practiced seeing the face of Christ in all my brothers (which I first learned from yoga teachers), I opened up to an empowering humility.  The more I approached people on the streets of New York who needed a smile, a buck, and to be treated like an equal, with an open heart and the Holy Spirit at my back, what a healing we both received!

From then on, I embraced Service at a new level.  My crown chakra opened, Grace flowed through the vessel I call my body, and Loving Light left a trail of sparkles on the streets of NYC for all to be sparked by, whenever they were ready.

Rarely have I uttered sweeter words than, “No, thank you!”  They were my proclamation of Innocence and Liberation.  And they freed us all!

Confusion is a Great Opportunity

If you are practicing the Workbook from A Course in Miracles and you are feeling confused, take that as a good sign.   Spiritual paths are meant to disorient you.  If you remain unmoved and unshaken, you are not really allowing the teaching to affect you–which indicates you are too mentally organized and too emotionally defended.

After all, if you actually understood everything the Course says, you wouldn’t be studying the Course.  Intellectual comprehension can only take us so far.  The real work begins when the ground shifts under our feet, when our way of seeing and hearing, listening and communicating, being and existing, changes.

Confusion helps us open our minds.   Learning to tolerate confusion, and, eventually, to even welcome and relax into confusion, is, paradoxically, the quickest way to clear the fog.

Confusion can be experienced in many ways:

1.  You may feel out of control or disoriented.  Maybe the world feels a bit surreal–like you’re in it but not of it.  This disorientation is natural as you bridge the gap from the ego thought system to the Holy Spirit’s One Loving Thought.  Think of it as stretching 🙂

2.  You may feel conflicted and call it confusion, even though it’s more of a back and forth between, “I want my personal life to be happy” and “I want to awaken to the truth that I am really formless Loving Light.”  It’s understandable to struggle between wanting a happy dream and wanting (or not wanting) to take responsibility for being the dreamer of the dream.  Here lies the ongoing opportunity to choose again: ego as teacher … or Holy Spirit?

3.  You may feel foggy and unable to think clearly.  Confusion can be experienced as a thick mist obscuring what is just ahead and making us grope slowly towards … we don’t know what.  This holds the promise of moving through the fog into the Light–if we can tolerate the unknown and make small leaps of faith.

4.  You may feel overwhelmed.  You could be overwhelmed by choices, by the demands of your schedule, or by your emotional reactions.  “Overwhelm” takes many forms.  As a Course student, the Shakepearean prose, and the amount of material to read is often felt to be “too much.”  You can join with your brothers–there are more ACIM groups and resources than ever before.  Just ask the Holy Spirit for guidance–and it doesn’t hurt to “google” too!  If you are taking an online class like my Workin’ the Workbook, take advantage of all the support that comes with the program.

5.  You may feel paralyzed or trapped in endless procrastination.  In Gestalt psychotherapy, there is a tremendously promising moment that occurs if the work is going well, and we call it “the impasse.”

The impasse is an opening in the mind in which our former defense mechanisms are dismantled and new ones haven’t formed yet.  Visualize a clock that you’ve taken apart.  All the pieces are laid out on a table.

Those pieces are components of your personality–the way your experience, your conditioning, and your temperament have come together to form your character.  There is great opportunity in this temporary dismantling.  Trust yourself to reorganize in a healthier way, free of old defenses.  ACIM Lesson 153 teaches us, “In my defenselessness my safety lies.”  One way of applying this lesson is to our relationship with ourselves.

A Course in Miracles, in Lesson 69, says it this way, “From where you stand, you can see no reason to believe there is a brilliant light hidden by the clouds.  The clouds seem to be the only reality.  They seem to be all there is to see.  Therefore, you do not attempt to go through them and past them, which is the only way in which you would really be convinced of their lack of substance.”

Only by walking into the thick mist, with the guidance of the Holy Spirit, will we emerge with clarity.  First, we must be willing to be confused.

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