08 Jan 2015 Comments Off on W-8: My mind is preoccupied with past thoughts.
W-8: My mind is preoccupied with past thoughts.
Commentary (full lesson beneath commentary)
This is getting funny now. The lesson says no one really sees anything, we’re just “seeing” our thoughts projected outward. I comprehend this through a swooping suction-y feeling, as if the content of my mind is being sucked through my forehead and vortexed forward and out. There it goes, what I believe, outpictured and accepted as reality. Yikes.
The lesson goes on to say that the only true thought about the past is that is doesn’t exist, therefore what we call thinking is actually in a state of blankness. Today’s exercise begins to train the mind to recognize when it is not thinking at all. That might make meditating easier. I could close my eyes and think about how all those passing thoughts are the past and my mind is actually blank. The thoughtless ideas I call thinking actually block the Truth. The Truth is there, but preoccupation with the past (Jesus is kind here — “obsession” is often more accurate) blocks the Truth.
This is important: Jesus says, “The purpose of the exercises for today is to begin to train your mind to recognize when it is not really thinking at all.” Stop. Let’s take that in.
The practice is: “I seem to be thinking about _________.” Fill in the blank and conclude with “But my mind is preoccupied with past thoughts.”
The purpose is to train my mind to recognize when it is not really thinking at all. The practice is to examine my thoughts. Purpose. Practice. Purpose. Practice.
Here goes: I seem to be thinking about having a snack and worrying that, at this rate, I’ll just get fatter and fatter. I seem to be thinking about my taxes and, oddly, feeling a sense of pleasure at being able to afford them. I seem to be thinking about that background noise: is the cat throwing up? I seem to be feeling irritated, but the exercise said that’s okay as long as I note my feeling. And anyway, all that’s actually happening is that my mind is preoccupied with past thoughts.
I am more the breath than I am the body. If I undo the body, I get back to the breath. The breath is invisible … except when it mists in cold temperatures. The breath is the bridge to Formlessness.
If God’s name is the sound of the breath, as I’ve learned more than once from various spiritual teachings, identifying with the breath takes me closer to God … I’ve also heard it said that when God exhales we inhale, and when God inhales we exhale. I’ve been invited to let God breath me. To put an end to my effortful breathing, my tense, constricted breathing, my shallow, inadequate inhales and overly depleting exhales and to just let myself fall into God’s flow, God’s rhythm, God’s breath of Life.
There’s been too much striving and trying for me. Even worse than perfectionism, all that trying. My mind is preoccupied with past thoughts, but something is budding, Something is making Itself felt. In spite of myself, thank God, the Truth shines on and Its Gleam within me glows softly, dimly, increasingly.
The lesson directs the practice for today, “I seem to be thinking about ______________.”
I seem to be thinking about my vision–there seems to be no comfortable distance from which I can read clearly. With contacts or without contacts, with reading glasses or without reading glasses, everything is mostly blurry and I feel sad about that. Many times I feel irritable, the texture-y anger and helpless that I call frustration. Right now I feel sad because I’m so engrossed in reading and writing these days and would like to enjoy reading and writing smoothly and effortlessly. But what’s really going on is that my mind is preoccupied with past thoughts. Right now 
I seem to be thinking about …
But my mind is preoccupied with past thoughts.
Four to five times of practice is suggested for today … unless the lesson is irritating me, lol.
LESSON 8
My mind is preoccupied with past thoughts.
This idea is, of course, the reason why you only see the past. No one really sees anything. His sees only his thoughts projected outward. The mind’s preoccupation with the past is the cause of the misconception about time from which your seeing suffers. Your mind cannot grasp the present, which is the only time there is. It therefore cannot understand time, and cannot, in fact, understand anything.
The one wholly true thought one can hold about the past is that it is not here. To think about it at all is therefore to think about illusions. Very few have realized what is actually entailed in picturing the past or in anticipating the future. The mind is actually blank when it does this, because it is not really thinking about anything.
The purpose of the exercises for today is to begin to train your mind to recognize when it is not really thinking at all. While thoughtless ideas preoccupy your mind, the truth is blocked. Recognizing that your mind has been merely blank, rather than believing that it is filled with real ideas, is the first step to opening the way to vision.
The exercises for today should be done with eyes closed. This is because you can actually not see anything, and it is easier to recognize that no matter how vividly you may picture a thought, you are not seeing anything. With as little investment as possible, search your mind for the usual minute or so, merely noting the thoughts you find there. Name each one by the central figure or theme it contains, and pass on to the next. Introduce the practice period by saying:
I seem to be thinking about __________.
Then name each of your thoughts specifically, for example:
I seem to be thinking about [name of a person], about [name of an object], about [name of an emotion],
and so on, concluding at the end of the mind-searching period with:
But my mind is preoccupied with past thoughts.
This can be done four or five times during the day, unless you find it irritates you. If you find it trying, three or four times is sufficient. You might find it helpful, however, to include your irritation, or any emotion that the idea for today may induce, in the mind searching itself.
For more on “I seem to be thinking about …” read Coming Apart at the “Seems”.
Let’s practice together! Watch and listen to me reading each ACIM Lesson on Youtube. Also, check out Workin’ the Workbook, my online class which supports the ACIM Workbook practice.
Connect with Amy