Lesson 22 – What I see is a form of vengeance.

Commentary (full lesson beneath commentary)

In 1998, there was great resistance to this lesson because I took it personally.  I thought Jesus was not acknowledging how far I had come in not judging people and being open-minded.

Now it is clear that Jesus is not speaking to little ego-fragment “me, Amy”, as a person.  He is simply stating that ego eyesight shows us forms and forms were made to obscure the Formless God-Self we truly are.

Forms can be transformed–the undoing process is an unforming, which these early lessons initiate.  Forms do not stop at material objects–forms begin with thought-form.

If I have attack thoughts, criticisms and judgments of myself or others, then I must see the world as vengeful.  The Course says I’ve projected my own anger out at the world and I expect revenge in return; I expect to be attacked.  Expecting attack, I lash out (and often lie to myself and say I’m being nice, or that I wouldn’t have lashed out if you hadn’t started “it”) and call it self defense.

“Why’d you have to make me do it?”

And so there is a vicious cycle of fear of attack leading to attack over and over again.  All the forms I see are a testament to my belief that I’ve separated from God and that I’m afraid I’ll be punished, so my best defense is an offensive strike.

Another way of putting it is that every form I see is a curtain I’ve drawn between myself and God.  This curtain obscures my Source so that I won’t remember God exists.  I don’t realize that I’m the dreamer dreaming an unreal dream which will end, and I with it, when “I” awaken … awakening is the opposite of condensation … a spreading back into Wholeness where All is the same One.

Jesus assures us that none of this is real; it is a savage fantasy from which we can “escape.”   There is a trans-formation process where we ask the Holy Spirit to use the forms we made for His Purpose of Love and Unification.  For a while we still see forms but from a Unifying Perspective.We made up the whole story of the world and humanity, because we dreamed we separated from God, and we dreamed up the hatred and murder with which we live.  But actually we are seeing “only the perishable,” “nothing that will last,” because what we see is not real–what we see is a form of vengeance.  Vengeance can be transformed with the Holy Spirit’s Vision … to help ourselves look with Him, we ask ourselves, “Is this the world I really want to see?”

LESSON 22

What I see is a form of vengeance.

Today’s idea accurately describes the way anyone who holds attack thoughts in his mind must see the world.  Having projected his anger onto the world, he sees vengeance about to strike at him.  His own attack is thus perceived as self defense.  This becomes an increasingly vicious circle until he is willing to change how he sees.  Otherwise, thoughts of attack and counter-attack will preoccupy him and people his entire world.  What peace of mind is possible to him then?

It is from this savage fantasy that you want to escape.  Is it not joyous news to hear that it is not real?  Is it not a happy discovery to find that you can escape?  You made what you would destroy; everything that you hate and would attack and kill.  All that you fear does not exist.  Look at the world about you at least five times today, for at least a minute each time.  As your eyes move slowly from one object to another, from one body to another, say to yourself:

I see only the perishable.
I see nothing that will last.
What I see is not real.
What I see is a form of vengeance.

At the end of each practice period, ask yourself:

Is this the world I really want to see?

The answer is surely obvious.

Let’s practice together!  Watch and listen to me reading each ACIM Lesson on Youtube.  Also, check out Workin’ the Workbook, my online class which supports the ACIM Workbook practice.